My daughter turned 21 on February 1st.
We Skyped the weekend before, and we Facebook messaged on the day of. We have a Skype date in a few weeks. But it's not the same. Due to our circumstances we'll always be apart. Even if money were no issue, we will never be able to be in the same country for more than six months at a time. It's a heartbreaking fact, as one never knows the future, or how long we'll have together.
Today was a pretty crappy day. There was no one specific thing, just a bunch of little things that added up to a crappy day. By the time I got home from work I was ready for a beer (or three). I changed into jammies and drank my dinner while writing it all out for Briony to read when she got up. The act of writing out what happened today and how I feel made me feel better. Knowing that she will get it and support me no matter what helps. The amazing thing about my relationship with my daughter is that she is my best friend.
We struggled over the years.
I started as a stranger that moved into her house and made a bunch of rules, but enriched her life.
We moved to Virginia and I fully became head of the household, but there were growing pains.
She moved to Wyoming and we had an amazing long distance relationship with twice a year visits.
I moved to Wyoming and we became roommates and we struggled. 90% of the time we were great, but teenagers are not easy, and we teetered on the edge of good and bad for a while.
She moved away and I thought she might be lost forever, but things weren't really easier away from me, and we became close again.
Over the last three years that she's been gone, we've gone from mother and daughter to best friend and confidant. We've shared some of the most intimate details of our lives. We've shared our feelings and our dreams. We really can (and do) tell each other everything, and I am so grateful for that relationship.
Even though we'll never be able to live in the same town (or country), we don't need to. We are family and distance doesn't change that. I have been so blessed to have become her (and Cale's) mom. I am a better person for this different kind of love that I have been lucky enough to experience.
Happy Birthday, again, my dear daughter. I hope that this year is your best yet, and each one after is subsequently better. I love you.
